LITTLE SHOP OF HORRRRRRORS...

sally tells us in class
once she went on a tour of a lab (on the mainland)
and most labs are in the basement of a hospital or tucked away next to the ER, etc.
and there are no windows.
so she is surprised to see that this lab has the most beautiful african violets
on the shelves above the work benches.
the leaves were nice and big and velvety 
and the flowers were nice and bright.
so she asked the techs there how this is possible without sunlight.
and they said,
"well, you know, there is the fluorescent light...
and once a week we hemolyze some leftover blood in water and feed the plants."

sigh, i knew working in the lab too long makes you a little "interesting".
i'm not sure if i should be intrigued or worried.

IMMUNOLOGY FRUSTRATIONS

uhhhhhhhgh.
immunology will single handedly kill my gpa and get me kicked out of the mlt program, i swear.
i love LOVE john b.- one of the funniest, funnest, coolest, smartest profs i know.
but his class is from 1245-0300pm and my brain is so fried after my 8-12 class.
it takes SO MUCH effort to stay awake.
immunology is seriously cool stuff but i am just so tired that everything is just flying over my head.
plus, he has these free form lectures and i never know what to take notes on. should i write on my lecture handouts? should i be taking my own notes (if you want to see what my notes look like, by the by, you can go to my edu site: http://www2.hawaii.edu/~codilee and click on the "mlt 108" section. i take 1-4 pages of notes every class and scan them all to pdf for future reviewing. doodles and block letters included) ? should i be reading the text book? studying the textbook? before class?
and his quizzes... never know what's going to be on it! i totally studied for the wrong thing this last quiz. we were already talking o chem in class so i was studying carboxyl, carbonyl, amino, sulfhydryl... but the quiz was on clonal selection! fraaaaaaak. there was a question about b cells and i guess i over though it. i should have said "b cells make antibodies when stimulated by antigen." how simple is that? instead i panicked and wrote something like "MHC on APC stimulates Tcells to make cytokines which activate B cells... " guh. and i totally forgot that toll like receptors are innate immunity. and wbc is innate immunity (damn it!) which means PAMPs are innate... so three wrong on that already. oh and macrophages innate, too. ok so four wrong. plus my stupid b cell answer. then i got the clonal selection "repetoire" question wrong. i talked about the main idea of it but didn't talk about differentiating to specific antibodies to create an "inventory". guh. which is like a super huge deal. that's what happens when you only study from the damn text book, i guess. so six wrong. i think i did ok on the questions about titers. maybe a half a point at least. this quiz is going to friggen kill my grade.
everything in class i learned before... vaguely. i remember things like protein structure and how to micropipette. but never in such detail.
and there is SO MUCH detail.
i think i am going to have to work my ass off for this class.
i wish there was more time in the day to do things.
it's really a shame that sleep is a required activity.
because, really. on tues/thurs i have class from 8-12. then 1245-3. then 445-7. then i have... 2 hours to eat, shower, chores, thumb twiddling. two hours to read/respond emails and twitters (i haven't even turned on my phone in several days)/laulima. then i need two hours to do chem problems. two hours to study immunology and take notes. two hours to do mlt homework. then i need two more hours to study specifically for upcoming quizzes. even if i decide not to go to photo lab (go home at 3pm) then i just end up using the time to do moar studying- specifically making flashcards and reviewing notes.
i never spent so much time studying in my life! this is how i studied for the ap exams. but the ap exams were only one day!
i guess i really have no right to complain- if only i actually passed chem 162 (with a C! i had a D.) in the summer then i'd have so much more time! and no pain no gain, right?
what's life without a challenge?!

PAINtball

hi guys.



before



during



after





after after









i know what you're thinking.
but it's sooooooooo worth it.

probably not playing again for several months...
we need a new hobby.

WINDY

I'm sitting on the stairs outside of iliahi waiting for my 1245 class,
immunology. I was hoping for more sunshkne but its pretty windy. Had
an exam today, this morning at 8am. I think I did ok. Not bad, but
not parfait. I know for sure I have at least 3 wrong. I think I
would have done better of I studied longer. Alas, I was tired last
night and didn't stay up past 130am.
Exam finished around 9 so I have the rest of my time off until my next
class. I did some chem problems (yuk yuk) and visited Kapu and got
some info about my flash- I want to use it tomorrow but want to do a
test roll first, but I can only do it in the dark... Guess I'll just
have to wing it. Think I'll try out my new tripod, too. No more
rubber bands! :D
Jolene sent me some info about a Lolita meet up in feb. Its at the
tcmhi! I can catch the bus there from my house! And I can get in free
from their promotion; to celebrate the 20th anniversary everyone 20
years old gets in free! Sounds like fun! I think it'll be another
good photo op- I'm just dying to get shooting again! Well, even more
I'm dying to work in the darkroom again! Next tues I definately will.
Sometimes I feel like I've blogged this before. Déjà vu.
(sometimes I go whole days listening bored half asleep.)
I had something else I wanted to say but can't remember now.
Bye.

MY DAD IN THE NEWSPAPER

my dad is in the honolulu advertiser's "dining out" section:
it's pretty exciting for us, but my dad gets all habut about it.
he's a background kind of guy and says he was "tricked" into the photoshoot.
the first time he was in the paper was for the thanksgiving-to-go special the hotel was doing.
they told him to prepare the food for a photo shoot.
and he did.  and then he was heading back to the kitchen and the paper guy was like
"... where are you going?"

the second time he was in the paper (since he's been at the prince-  he was in the papers when he was at the ilikai, too, but that's a whole other story.) was the next thanksgiving where they recycled his picture to advertise and didn't tell him.  
he opened the paper and his expression was O_____O  WTFFFF.

the next time, the chef [kham] said there was going to be a photo shoot and if he could prepare the food, etc. etc.
and on the day of the shoot, the chef was off island so my dad said "i got put on the cover by default".  
i think that's pretty awesome.  i've never been on the cover of a newspaper, let alone have my own article!

and then this time, my dad was off work.  and the chef called and asked him to switch days off.
and of course he obliged.  the chef then calls back with a "by the way, there's a photo shoot..."
and my dad gets all >___< but he already said yes, he'd work.

heheheeee.

there might be another article later,
the hotel lobby just opened a "lounge" that has a bar and some pupus.
at the planning stages, the chef was dealing with the big island restaurant (they just reopened and didn't have a chef) so the lobby lounge (now called the reef lounge) was my dad's pet project.  he got to make the menu and it was almost like having your own restaurant without all the hard stuff.  the manager and the f&b dir helped figure out the cost and how many people are needed to work and they had a designer and logo and everything.  so he just got to make the menu.  which is super cool.
even cooler, he ran some things by me as they were planning.  what i know of the menu: 
kalua pig nachos 
smoked salmon pizza
escargot/boursin pizza
calamari rings
pepper steak
eh, that's all i know for now.
he's thinking of adding hamburger sliders later.
it's really fun to imagine the possibilities!
here are some photos of the prelim food:

maybe there will be official pictures sooon!

DON'T JUDGE ME

I like hollister jeans.
I got a gift card for hollister for christmas. I've only been in the
store two or three times before. It always makes me angry because the
store is so damn dark. Especially the dressing room. You can never
tell if the stuff actually fits or looks good because it's so dark!
And it's noisy and it smells bad and half naked men traipse around the
store refolding clothes and shuffling the hangers as soon as you are
done touching the clothes. Furthermore, it is mostly ripped up
clothes [jeans].
I gave up trying to spend my credit because the store is so
irritating- practically a violation of the local disturbance of the
peace law.
I went online to see if I could make a complaint and came across the
online store.
While still portraying the feeling of preppy beach wear and an
Americanized surf culture, the site is miles better than the store.
There is easy navigaton, adequate product pictures and it doesn't reek
of perfurme and belt out music in inaudible bass. I alaienjoy the
anonymity of shopping online and without being eyed out by workers.
I ended up buying a pair of dark wash jeans- without holes and stuff-
in an appropriate size (they had a short inseam) and at a cheaper
price than in store- even with the shipping.
It turned out to be a good buy- I really like the basicness of it
(definately matches a lot of things in my wardrobe and not fancy nancy
pokeys and zippers and bling) and the fit turned out alright. Over
priced? Maybe. But i used up my credit - and that was a big help. I
paid about $10 out of pocket (a little bit more than the shipping) so
it was a good deal.
Despite the cliches and connotations that go with shopping and buying
from hollister, I don't consider it a fashion or culture crime to have
and admit liking these jeans. I'm not above spwnding money at
corporate chains or big box retailers (o walmart, what would I do
without thee?) if they can benefit me in a small way. So sue me, I
look good in these skinny jeans. New pants can't change a whole
person, but they make you happier and more confident whichbleafs to
greater things.
So guys, don't judge me.


It's day two of my magnesium regimen- and I don't know if it's
chemistry, weather, or placebo- but I am feeling great! The nausea is
completely gone (or back to normal, I guess) and the headaches have
decreased about 1000000000 times in intensity and recurrence. I had a
few sharp spring ups of head ache but it was gone fairly quick. This
also put me in a good mood (although they say magnesium can also
supplement certain mood drugs by increasing enzyme pathways) and I
think layne appreciated it much. ; ) maybe it really is a placebo
(although I must admit I thought the magnesium would do jack shit and
I'd end up having to visit a doc this week) or a change in weather
(the vog is leaving and it's getting really really cold) or I just
recovered from a virus of something. I don't know and can't card now
because I'm just happy its gone! I'll continue the magnesium and
report back again.

Yesterday I was kind of busy so I didn't blog. But what a he'll of a
day! My mom'e car died and caught on fire! Lucky thing she was
across the street from a fire station at the time! The car had to be
towed home and is probably never going to run again. And Then... The
toilet broke! My sister flushed and the handle just fell off! So I
opened the tank and found that the rod connecting the handle to the
chain was snapped off and had to get a new part. Ofciurse now it
starts pouring rain and I have to take the bus to walmart to get the
part... One hour later I'm on the toilet with a wrench taking the damn
thing apart. No body told me that the plastic nut is actually
tightened in the opposite (counter clockwise) direction! I was trying
to unscrew the damn thing for about 15 minutes and it was just
loosening and tightening itself over and over! Finally I decided to
try turning it in the clockwise direction figuring that it would get
so tight that it would crack and snap off (thus allowing me to remove
it) when lo! It got looser! Finally managed to get it off! And
Then... The Fricken new part that I bought had the arm at a wierd
angle so it was scraping the inside of the tank! I had to breakout
the pliers and bend it in the opposite direction so the handle would
be free to move. You know me- a good problem silver but not very good
at practical application... I finally fixed the toilet and it's
working! I'm making a note here, huge success! This is a pretty big
deal for me because I am so bad at mechanics and stuff.
And why, you may ask, was I fixibg a toilet and not at school on this
fine Friday? Because we had an island wide (almost state wide, but
the big island was nor included) civil defense warning for high
winds! Suppordly 60mph winds! However, it was just a mild panick
attack on the part of the national weather service and of was fairly
calm except for mild power outages in Kailua, waiks, and Mille ville.
There was a huge down pouf of rain a few times but we've had worse. I
did hear that Maui got the wknd pretty bad- flights were grounded
because it was too dangerous to takeoff. So
The day was spent making oatmeal cookies (see my twitter for live
photos of the process), fixing stuf, chemistry homework, and calming
mom's nerves.
Today I had my usual volunteer. Then came home and watched one of my
favorite musicals- seven brides for seven brothers- on turner classic
movies and then went out with layne. We went to look at paintball
stuff (next week Saturday, bitches!) than get some food and then
played left 4 dead.

That's all for now. Time to do laundry.

I BOUGHT SOME MAGNESIUM

i hope it starts working soon.
it's been two weeks. 
is that normal?
have you ever had a headache for two weeks?
i have things to do.
headaches are so counter productive.
-______-

ONLY THE SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL AND I'M LOSING IT!

wooooooo...
last night i had this wierd dream where a got killed by a man with a chain saw.
he just sawed me in half from the skull down, (i was sitting on the floor)
there was a TON of blood.
and later when i was a ghost i was watching tv with other dead people.
some of them were burning or bleeding.
straaaange.

I'M SITTING RIGHT HERE.

you know what sucks?
when people don't realize they say something offensive.
my friends happen to talk about how short hair is cute but long hair is beautiful.
and of course every one has long hair except for me.
not very offensive, and i'd never give up my awesome hair cut.
but really, guys.  i'm sitting right here.
you basically announced to me that i will never be beautiful.
well fuck you and your high fashion.
i happen to think i look great.
or another time, one of my friends said yellow shoes are cool.
he said he'd date a girl with yellow shoes 
because not many people are gutsy enough to wear yellow shoes.
he said, that the only person he could think of that might have yellow shoes was me.
at that time, i didn't have yellow shoes (i do now- i love campers!)
and after i responded to his shoe question he blatantly said
that i was just cute and not really cool.

you know, i don't even know why this bothers me.
it behooves us, as individuals with an agenda, to live a life without care to others' opinions.
but really, isn't half the point of life to achieve recognition?
is it really possible to live without caring what others think of you?
i try.  but it's hard.
my mantra of existentialism doesn't always work- this is evidence.

i mention a lot that i oscillate between loving my friends to death and hating their guts.
this might be why.  
and i share some blame, too.  sometimes i just like my friends in want of loneliness.
and what good are friends if they never give you a good fight?
i'm concluding that this was my brutus-caesar moment because i'm really vain.
and i try hard to look nice.
and these guys just shot my self esteem.

ok, so that's it.
fun is fun and done is done.
i will boost my self esteem by noting that i can censor myself well and don't talk shit about pretty sunsets.
there are too many people in this world who don't know about self censoring, self control, and social protocol.
not that i know all of those things- but i can at least know when to keep my mouth shut.





school has begun.
i'm going to study like there's no tomorrow.
i'm tired of being a poseur- jack of all trades and master of none.
i want to know something real.  i want to know this heme stuff and biochem stuff like the back of my hand.
i will stay up all night if i have to.
only thing currently stopping me is the stupid headaches.
we are going on one and a half weeks now.
flourescent lights and computer screens are my enemies.
go away, already!

I LIKE * BETTER THAN =

but in order to get the devArt fancy new profile you have to be a beta tester. so i traded my * for a = and now i've dazzled my page up. they even have a cool widget for twitter! swt! i also uploaded another pola from my seaaaashore set- i'll eventually upload them all. (i also have a bunch of negs to scan, i forgot i just picked them up on fri.) i was going through my scraps on the site, here's some eye candy i forgot i had:

showing off my newly arrived pentax k1000.
(a superb slr! i recommend!)
i kinda miss the green hair...



my friend, gb.



one time at work we had to make 40, cat V cables.
our fingers were a little beat up from stripping wire after that.
the best part was using the connection tester- sometimes it said no connection even though it was ok.



before my diagonal hair, i had straight hair.
voici holga.



how i study for microbiology:



ok, that's enough.

IDENTITY IS THE FIRST STEP TO TREATMENT

Ok so headaches start to get worse even though the sulfur dioxide
levels are going down (according to shari shima, weather caster) and
the vog is rolling out. Nausea is still kind of off and on. At the
prodding of mom, I did a little research and found that maybe I have a
PMS induced migraine.
Personally, I always thought that migraines were a bunch of bs. I
figured you either have a headache or you don't. Migraine was like a
fancy word to describe it to get attention.
The more I read about it though, the more likely it seems. I'm
looking at a book by readers digest called "fight back with food;
using nutrition to heal what ails you" and it describes migraine as a
"throbbing headache" with early warning signs including "nausea,
weakness, sensitivity to light and sound". It can even last up to
three days, untreated.
Causes include "caffeine withdrawls, dehydration, stress, hormones,
consumption of foods with certain chemicals." I hope I'm not allergic
to lakerol. Licorice is the love of my life! I am also going to
continue my coffee habit- it looks like cutting caffeine was the
opposite recommendation.
It goes on to recommend foods with magnesium (avocados, rice, winter
melon) for pain, riboflavin (mushroom, poultry, quinoa) for energy,
and Ginger for nausea.
I guess that's a start.
We'll see just how long this lasts. So far it's been a week of
general blahhness. Hopefuly this clears up before class starts
(Monday!).
Also, do I sound hypochondriac-ish? I try not to be. Because being
sick is a fuckarow.

Today I went to imageworks in kaimuki to pick up some photo supplies.
I figure better now than when school starts and there's a rush of
people. I got some d76, dektol, 100 sheets of 8x10" ilford pearl rc,
10 sheets 11x14" ilford pearl rc, and three rolls of ilford hp5 35mm
400iso. That should hold me for a while. The lady who works there
was like "THANK YOU FOR BEING EARLY!".
I can't wait to get back to the darkroom.
Later, I spent some time with layne. We had coffee (actually, I had
coffee. He had chai :9 ) and watched harold and kumar go to white
castle. Then we watched the jackass movie. Is it messd up that
watching other peole suffer made me laugh? I think it should be called
dumbass instead of jackass.
Speaking of bad movies, last weds layne and I watched pulse 1, 2, &
3. What a load of crap. The signal was 1000000 times better than
those movies. And 2 & 3 were obviously shot on a green screen because
the lighting was so off! I think we laughed more than one is supposed
to in a scary movie! In all honesty, I didn't find it scary at all
(I've seen some scary stuff before- the strangers made me jump a
little and the first time I watched ju-on I ran out of my house after
the lady came out from under the blanket) and there were waaaaaay too
many plot holes. Oh well, at least I can say I've seen a trilogy of
horror movies in one night. How many people can say that?
Bye for now.
I'll post again later, from a real computer.
(I'm on my itouch now posting via gmail. I love blogger because I
barely have to go to the page- I'm on email all day at work anyway so
it's super easy to update. And I can do a lot of quick updates
without having to log in.)

Peace, guys.

IT'S GONE

did i ever tell you about the time i just lost it?
i used to keep all of my old school work.
since i was in 7th grade up until spring 08 semester.
every note, every paper, every project, every flashcard, every homework.
and one day i realized that nobody fucking cared.
nobody cared how hard you worked in high school.
nobody ever looked at the old work again.
not even me.
and i just lost my mind and threw all of it away.
you know those copy paper boxes that hold six reams?
i threw away seven full boxes.
all my work... out to the garbage.
it was one of the hardest things i've ever had to do.
i was really sad and mad after i took it out to the rubbish.
i felt like, i wasted my life.
like all those papers were a part of my life.
i threw away every certificate i won since elementary school.
every speech and debate piece i performed.
one whole five subject notebook that was filled on both sides of the page.
over five hundred index cards i used for studying.
there were probably 30 book reports in there.
lab reports and research papers.
every speech and debate ballot i ever won or lost.
history notes and questions that i stayed up until morning to finish.
hundreds of math assignments.
so much hard work.
it was a representation of my life.
and i threw it away.
and i think about it a lot, now.
i still have a hard time letting it go.
i'm so mad at myself that i let myself get rid of it.
i figured out that those years of my life were terrible and worthless.
and i don't want to remember anyway.
but to physically rid myself of those memories is such a hard thing to do.
the real confirmation that it was worthless.
you know what made it worse?
my mom is the one who told me to keep it ("might be useful one day")
but she had no objections to tossing it
and she never cared about the hard work i did in those years.
no appreciation.
no one will ever know what all that work meant to me-
i had nothing besides school.
even now i get excited over new school supplies because that was all you had-
school.  
and the measure of your person was how well you did in school
how hard you worked
how late you stayed up
how high your gpa was
how nifty your school supplies were
how many flash cards you made
how many certificates you got (even though they were just templates from ms word).
it's amazing how all this affects me.
it's been months since i've tossed it
(since then i've started another box.  after this semester i'll toss it and start another box.  but it's nothing compared to all my old stuff.)
but i still feel so empty and worthless when i think about it.
that's why my motto is
"fun is fun and done is done".
i don't ever want to think about the past.
again.
not even the old old past
(too many long gone friends and family)
or the recent past
(i haven't done anything worthwhile in life)
or even ponder too far in the future
(don't get your hopes up... you know how it goes when things don't turn out how you imagined).
better to be existential;
i'm here today, maybe tomorrow.  
let it be.

and why did this come up?
my friend is taking zool 141 and wanted to borrow my text book
(I NEVER THROW TEXT BOOKS AWAY.  EVER.)
and i said i have hundreds of flash cards and notes she can use too-
muscle insertions and origins
and enzyme pathways
and general notes on anatomy and physiology.
turns out
I FUCKING THREW IT AWAY.
it's gone.
i only have the text book.
AND I'M PISSED.


guh.
now i have to go to sleep in a bad mood.

WEATHER INDUCED INSANITY

Ok, I believe the sickness is weather induced. It's kona wind now and
the sulfur dioxide is blowing in. Soon it will be voggy, I know.
Headaches thus afternoon and tonight so bad. I'm ready to drive a
steak into my brain to make it stop! Anything, please!
So busy at work, too. I have flyers, surveys, brochures, websites,
laulina crap, and a slew of other things. Not helping the brain.
In a fit of insanity I splurged on two dresses, two rings, and a watch
from urban outfitters (yesterday was pay day). I also have an ebay
bid on an angelic pretty fukubukuro that ends in a day or so. <3
shopping! I'm also about to drop a hundred bucks on a five month bus
pass. And I believe my devart subscription is expiring in January and
I need to buy more lakerol (mmm salvi, salmiak and special...) because
I can't live without art and licorice.
I blame the weather... I'm clearly not in the right frame of mind!
Please excuse my shopping habits?
At least I found out (officially) today that I'm getting a tuition
refund because my (sevn hundred dollar!) grant was approved. Woot.
I guess hard work at celtt pays off. Better write my boss a thank you
note.


(I hope things start to look up for you, E.)

8I

MIND OVER MATTER

I wasn't going to blog about this at first but I think I want to write
about this just so it's out and I can ponder it later.
Lately I've been unusually sick.
My cold is wearing down, I'm barely coughing, and I just have a slight
scratchy voice in the mornings from a post nasal drip at night. So I'm
getting better on that front.
But lately I've been nauseated. And tired. It happened all of a
sudden. On Saturday I went to volunteer as usual but in the middle of
making charts I was starting to get light headed.
No wait, it started before that. The night before that I woke up and
tossed a little with stomach cramps. But I was fine in the morning
and passed it off as a dream.
So back to the surgicenter, I was pushing my papers and the light was
so white and bright and the words on the papers were dizzying, I swear
I was going to pass out. Instead I went to the bathroom and vomited.
Nice.
Since my days of sleepless nights and AP exams I was used to nausea
and functioning at school on pure adrenaline and an empty stomach so I
acted casually and managed to scrape through my remaining three hours
at the sc.
The remainder of the day I was still nauseated but convinced it was a
24hr bug or food poisoning or maybe fatigue (although the latter two
were dim possibilities in my mind- I hadn't eaten much the night
before and I have not had any hard labor or stress in several weeks).
The next day, nausea again. And bad headaches. Not as bad headaches
as voggy day headaches, but still there. And not nauseous to the point
of throwing up or passing out but still there. Enough to keep me at
home and lethargic. What a waste of winter vacation.
And again today.
The morning was alright. I was a little woosey but I thought it was
from lack of sleep- I was up until 1am reading a book. Later in the
day- around 3pm I felt like I was swimming. I just wanted to go home
and lie down.
Now I have no idea what this could be. A virus? Perhaps. It's not
lack of food as I originally thought (in fact I wonder if it is over
eating- I don't usually finish my sandwich lunch in it's entirety).
Maybe too much licorice? I heard of a lady who went into a coma from
too much licorice. I do eat a lot of those lakerol pastilles
everyday... But I don't think I ate thaaaat much. And I didn't eat any
on sunday. I stopped taking my allergy drugs since I stopped coughing
so I don't think that's it either. So i am officially out of ideas.
I'm going to hope that this will just phase out and I can make myself
feel better by sucking licorice pastilles and convincing myself that
sickness is all in my mind. It seems to have worked before.
I just hope it's over soon (I hate feeling like I'm going to faint
everytime I stand up) because it's messing with my metabolism (if you
know what I mean... I can't really talk about it here) and just
making me feel crummy.
Mayhaps it's punishment for not drowning in my dream. Or a
psychsomatic terror (I'll tell you about that next time).

Mind over matter.
Mind over matter.
Mind over matter...

AGAIN WITH THE DREAMS OF WATER

ok, there is something to blog about.
last night, another dream of water.
i was at manoa pool (a warped version)
and i was at roosevelt and i was going there after school
i remember trying to walk down from the bandroom.
i could swim and dive down really deep and stay at the bottom for a long time.
i could hold my breath very well... insanely long... even though it was hard work.
what struck me was how warm and bright it was even at the depths.
i might have been wearing a water polo cap (can't remember)
and i was retrieving something from the bottom.
i was supposed to be helping some people (haole.  didn't know them)
a male and a female.
they weren't good at swimming.
and there was another lady there, not in the pool, but on the deck
and she was a witch of sorts.
she might even have been wearing black.
and she was giving directions to the strangers about how to do something
but they weren't skilled enough to do it
so i was helping them by swimming and diving for things.
oh!  i think i was trying to put a necklace (which i had to get from the deep)
and put it on them.
and then i distinctly remember that she said
"now you will need a scarf"
and they replied "i have a flat denim scarf you can use"
weeeeeeird.
i woke up soon after.
but i remember it was bright and sunny in my dream.
i think that was the first time i was swimming and it was not dark and i was not drowning.
yey.

I'M HERE

just nothing blog worthy going on.
SSDD.  8I

INSTANT TIME MACHINE!

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