Sunday's samadhi show was so amazing! Performing was a new and unique experience for me, and now that it's done I'll forever be chasing the high of my first time.

Not going to lie, I was really nervous at home in the two hours before I was supposed to show up. I used the bathroom so many times. i couldn't even watch TV because it was making me nauseated. I just sat in silence, trying to read a comic book (Brad Meltzer Identity Crisis saved my life) and calm the fuck down!  I already told myself we did this routine a ton of times and it wasn't very technical and we were only in the studio performing for friends... But I just couldn't help feeling like a bowl of mush. 

T-minus two hours before the show starts I finally get to the studio.

And then something magical happened!

There was funky music blasting! And disco lights! And everybody there was all smiles!

Every bit of nervousness just melted away at that moment and was replaced by wonder, relief, and excitement.

Backstage, there were people stretching and putting on false eyelashes.  The greatest 70s dance songs were playing and every one was dancing with each other! There were stray sequins all over the floor and a perpetual cloud of hair spray. I didn't know most of the other performers- just saw them in passing between classes- but everyone was so friendly I didn't care! In any other situation I might have hid in the bathroom until seven or pretended to be busy reading a book. Instead I decided if this is what the circus life was like, this is where I want to be.

What really sealed the deal was the final words of the teachers to the group. Thinking about it now, the words were pretty much what you'd expect and filled with the adequate amount of cheesiness- have fun, don't panic up in the air if something goes wrong, we are proud of you, etc etc. My instructor, Marie, even pointed out that my two classmates and I were "show virgins" and every one cheered and giggled.  But it was the studio owner and director, Andrea, that said what I loved the most: we really perform for each other. Everyone who does aerial also loves to watch aerial and if we could share just a slice of that excitement with our friends and family in the audience it would be an amazing show.

The rest of the night went by in a flash. I lost a towel somewhere backstage. We cheered and clapped along with the audience (maybe even louder than them!) at every daring drop or disco booty shake. It was humid as fuck up in the loft and it nearly caused me to get stuck in one of my hip keys but I really really couldn't stop smiling!  I should have been having a minor heart attack since all this is happening ten feet off the ground and everybody was watching me (I saw Andrea stand up really quick, from the corner of my eye, which is a red flag if there ever was one) but for some reason I couldn't wipe the insane smile off my face!  Then there was a tribute to prince. And a little roller skate number. And one of the guys dressed up as Donna Summer. My favorite was the straps duo, so beautifulllllll! 

At the end of the show, Andrea announced four students would be traveling to Montreal for the summer on scholarship for training!  And one of the girls got proposed to on stage! I don't think my heart could have been any fuller.

I have one picture we took backstage. 

"that one time we were sparkly circus people"

And one of me and my pal, Emily, eating a sandwich and orange freeze at Like Like Drive-In after the show. 

^ this girl flew in from the big island just to see me!  i have the best fucking friends in the world.

But besides that, no pictures of the actual aerial performances.  i think it's just like my favorite song: got no time to take a picture, I'll remember someday...
so if you're reading this, thanks for sticking with me through that text wall.  i only have memories of what a great night it was, but it's good enough to keep me heading back to the studio for a long time to come.

PS -

if you want to try your hand at flying, new summer sessions are starting for adults and kids. maybe you'd like to hang on a trapeze?  or climb the silks?  maybe just want to try a different kind of exercise?  i'm sure you won't regret it. :) 

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